Why Lasting Change Feels So Slow in the Short Run
Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Unsplash.
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PROJECT OF THE WEEK
One of the lessons I’ve had to learn over and over again is this: You can’t put a time limit on how long change takes.
Not real, lasting change. Not “this-is-who-I-am-now” kind of change.
And honestly? That’s frustrating.
Because we want to believe that after 30 days (or 90, or 6 months), we’ll have it down. That it will feel automatic. That we’ll no longer have to try.
But that’s not how most of it works.
Whether you're building a new habit, learning a new skill, or trying to get your systems to finally feel natural, it almost always feels hard for a lot longer than you think it should.
And then... one day, it doesn’t.
Not because there was a lightbulb moment. Not because of some massive transformation. But because, somewhere along the way, it just started to stick.
A Few (Very Human) Examples
Invoicing clients used to feel impossibly hard. I’d procrastinate. I’d dread it. I’d have to psych myself up just to open QuickBooks.
And then, years later, I realized it no longer felt hard. Do I love it? No. I still don’t enjoy asking for money. But now it’s just... a task. One that gets done without a ton of emotional energy. Progress.
Writing this blog used to feel like an event. It was on my calendar. I had to plan my week around it, both physically and mentally. I’d block time, prepare a fun beverage, set up my comfy writing space, maybe light a candle. (It’s amazing how many ways we can “prepare” when we’re really just avoiding.)
Now? I actually enjoy it. I don’t always write it on the same day. Sometimes I sit down between meetings or during a lull in my afternoon and just start typing. No drama. Just writing. And I kinda love that.
Routines as a foster parent were another big one. When we started building morning and evening routines, they felt so hard. There were tears. There was resistance. From both of us. I remember thinking, “These are such basic things. Why do they feel like climbing a mountain?”
And then one day, two years later, I realized it didn’t feel that way anymore. There was a rhythm. There was ease. Not always perfect, but no longer exhausting.
Getting Started
But Not Everything Becomes Easy
Here’s another important part of the story: If something still feels like a grind after years of trying, it might not be for you.
For a long time, I tried to meditate every morning. And maybe I didn’t give it enough time, but I gave it a few years, on and off. I read the books. I downloaded the apps. I really tried.
But it never became something I looked forward to. It always felt like something I should do, not something I wanted to do.
Eventually, I let it go.
I still take a few deep breaths when I’m overwhelmed. I still pause when I feel my heart rate climbing. But I no longer force myself to sit cross-legged in silence every morning.
And that’s okay, too.
So What’s the Point?
Change takes time. Sometimes a lot of time.
You may not notice it happening. You may think nothing is shifting. But you’re laying the groundwork. You’re building the muscle. You’re showing up.
And if you keep showing up, imperfectly, inconsistently, but persistently, there’s a very good chance that one day, you’ll look around and realize:
This thing that used to be so hard? It’s just part of your life now.
And that’s a quiet kind of magic I never get tired of seeing.
Ready to Get Started?
If you're feeling excited about putting this strategy into action and could use a little extra accountability and support, the It’s All in the Planning Starter Pak is here to help! Designed to set you up for success, it’s the perfect tool to keep you on track and moving forward.
Let’s make progress together—because great results start with great planning!
A Note from Happy Spaces
Our goal is simple: to add value to your life. If you think this project will be helpful, here are some steps to set yourself up for success:
Estimate how long it will take—then double it. Giving yourself extra time helps reduce stress.
Schedule it on your calendar for the week ahead. Setting a specific date increases follow-through.
Break it up if it will take more than an hour. Tackling it in smaller steps makes it more manageable.
Make a list of every action needed before you start. A clear plan helps keep you on track.
Do what works for you—you don’t have to complete every part, just what adds value to your life.
Find an Accountability Partner—having support makes it easier to stay committed.
We understand that building new habits and systems can be challenging, but you don’t have to do it alone. For additional support, visit HappySpacesBySarah.com and let’s make organizing and planning easier together.
Creating a life you don't need a vacation from! ®
Sincerely,
Sarah Weingarten
Meet Sarah
As the oldest of nine kids with two working parents, I grew up juggling many responsibilities at home. Organization and time management became my lifeline amidst the chaos.
I attended the Cornell Hotel School and pursued my childhood dream of working in the hospitality industry. In 2016, I launched Happy Spaces, combining my passion for structure and efficiency with helping others.
I love working with students to develop essential organizational, time management, and study skills. These skills empower them to reach their full potential, build confidence, and create a future they feel good about.